When Outrage May Mean Depression
“Irritable! That is how I frequently feel!” And upon checking with my better half, she agreed. Peculiar as it might appear we both realised something wasn't right, separately, on the same day, after 18 months of struggle.
Because of the realisation the consuming angriness that would rise up without warning was really an indicator that I was reaching my end – I was depressed. What a revelation that was; to understand there had been a way out, but that that way out meant admitting my weakness. And then an irony appeared; the moment I admitted my desire for help, in that moment – that very moment – hope drew near.
Bad temper is a tell tale sign of depression, particularly in males.
Something would go ‘wrong ‘ and I might flip into a rage, regardless of if I was alone or no-one else noticed; within me I was beside myself with fury. And at the very same time part of me was asking, in a desperate state of perplexity, “What’s going on here, Steve?!”
Such fits of outrage were tiring, and though happily there had been customarily no observable harm made, there was much spiritual torture that needed to be reconciled. I was beyond control and did not understand how to restore that control.
But the word irritability – or testy – got me wondering. It struck me in a second of openness of heart and mind. God used that word to bare his truth. My irritation with the sign I was depressed. I had fought the best I could, in my own strength, for 18 months. Now was the time to truly admit my weakness and find help.
WHY Outrage Is Sometimes THE SIGN OF DEPRESSION
Why would we get immoderately indignant otherwise, unless our inner world was in turmoil?
Sometimes annoyance is all we have left to rail against a world we will be able to neither understand nor work with. That world, for who knows what reason or reasons, has given us cause to feel confounded in some way. All we have left is fury. And self-righteousness is the driver, because justice has not been served – in the opinion of the depressed attitude.
Anger reveals sadness for the issues of disregard in our lives we don't have any control over. And it doesn't take much to feel beyond control.
When we admit our unhappiness nonetheless , as we have realised the role hate is playing, the trail to recovery opens up – in spite of the despair inside our circumstance. When there is a need, get professional help to assist you, before it is affecting your life and make you ned up in debt for cultivating nasty habits!
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Uncharacteristic bad temper can be a sign of the sadness of depression. Sometimes all we have left is anger; but upon realising our need for help, to admit that, opens a path to recovery. If we are truthful about anger we could see the unhappiness beneath. Such unhappiness is an invite to be explored, to be validated, and to be wrestled with. As soon as we do these things the door to hope swings ajar and then completely open.
Peggy Chen is a mechanical engineer in The East overseeing the implementationg and problem-fixing of plants reporting budgeting and proposals. During her off days she likes to do some travelling and sight seeing. Level-headed and sincere character she is making a good pal and specialist to people around her.
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